5 Reasons why 'Froot' by Marina and the Diamonds should be called Fruit

21:00



1. It puts off potential listeners. Marina and the Diamonds is one of my all time favourite artists. Electra Heart is one of my five favourite albums ever. Out of every artist in the whole world that I haven't seen live yet (which will always be too many), she is the ONE artist I want to see the most. Yet I just saw the title 'Froot' and assumed it would be crap. The audio for Froot has been available since the 10th October. I didn't actually listen to it until my friend Daniel played it for me in November shortly before I spilled the majority of a glass of red wine on his sheets. And yeah, I thought it was alright, but I didn't really bother listening to it again until TODAY. Today I realised that this song is completely amazing and have been listening to it on repeat, but still, all those wasted months. 

2. It doesn't reflect how amazing the lyrics are. So think about the title of the song 'Froot'. Can you think of a song title worse? I'm struggling. (Maybe 'F**kin' Perfect' by P!nk? Song title quoted directly from Spotify. Asterisks have no place in a song title.) 
However, lyrically, this is completely different. Not only does it have "don't give me a reason that it's not the right season" and the perfect Geri Halliwell reference of "living la dolce vita, life couldn't get much sweeter". It gets BETTER. Every so often I hear a lyric which sticks in my head for ages because it is so perfect and wonderful, and this is why I listen to music, because of those three second periods which just sum up a single emotion you have spent your whole life being unable to articulate. Two 2014 examples:
"I've never met someone so different." - Shakira ft Rihanna, Can't Remember To Forget You.
"It was never just fun and I thought you were different." - Ed Sheeran, Don't 
Froot has one of those perfect lyrics. Wait for it...
"I've been saving all my summers for you."
Imagine feeling like that.

3. It doesn't reflect how absolutely drop-dead amazing Marina looks in the video.


I wore a dress similar to this in a different colour to my Christmas party and if I had watched this video before I went it would have changed my whole approach to instagramming the outfit for the better. Bitter.

4. It's simply incorrect. 

I like to think of myself as being a little bit above deciding my opinion on a person based on their usage of spelling and grammar but I also liked to think myself a little bit above deciding not to date a person anymore because they were unable to find the correct exit at Clapham Junction station and unfortunately I proved myself wrong. Marina, you are NOT a four year old, and you KNOW the correct spelling of this word. Especially as it is not even as if you have INVENTED a word for this song, as this song lyrically references ACTUAL FRUIT throughout and you're even wearing AMAZING PINEAPPLE EARRINGS FOR THIS VIDEO.

5. It means I can't give this song a 10/10.

If this song was called 'Fruit' it would be a 10/10. It is so grown up and sexy and cool and clever and when I'm listening to it I like to imagine myself in outfits matching the song's aesthetic which is always a sign of a good song (see also: Glamazon by RuPaul). Unfortunately I am unable to do this as this song is not called Fruit. It is called FROOT. I cannot be expected to deal with this.



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