10 Years Ago vs Today

23:14

Well everyone (all four people that read 10 Years Ago vs Today), I'm going to be frank, across both top 5s today we have the grand total of ONE new entry which upsettingly everyone and their nan have already written a thinkpiece about. But just humour me and give this a brief scan, okay? You know how hard I try to wring out content.

Top 5 10 Years Ago - 2nd October 2004

5. GREEN DAY - AMERICAN IDIOT (Down from 3)


Yes, in Autumn 2004 we had two consecutive identical top 5s but at least they were all in a slightly different order to help me at least try to wring out some tension. There are lots of comments on the video of this song about Credible Fans being angry about 5 Seconds of Summer covering this, so I thought I'd look at a couple of YouTube covers and decide whether or not they were better or not. 

American Idiot Acoustic Cover


I don't think this song works as an acoustic as part of its (tenuous) charm is the loud hollering and drums. I also don't like the wallpaper. GREEN DAY 1 - COVERS 0

American Idiot Harmonica Cover

Everyone loves a harmonica and I think this guy really made the song his own, particularly around the 1:20 mark where he starts riffing all over the place. I'm also a fan of his cushions. GREEN DAY 1 - COVERS 1

American Idiot Broadway Show Version 

A lot of people in checked shirts and eyeliner jumping around to pop punk, which reminded me a little too strongly of my first year of university. As a side note, I watched Billie Joe Armstrong introduce this little number in aghast disbelief as when I was fourteen I genuinely fancied him more than anyone else on the entire earth except for possibly Lozenge Boy. Now, he most certainly fails the Wetherspoons test. (If they weren't famous and approached you in Wetherspoons would you go for it). GREEN DAY 2- COVERS 1

I first reviewed American Idiot last week.  Bonus for any fans of my previous poetry videos: if they're still in next week maybe I'll do my own cover and read the lyrics over a hip hop beat.

SCORE: 7/10


4. JOJO - LEAVE (GET OUT) (Up from 5)



When I was a teenager I used to constantly daydream about finding boys that would treat me badly. My usual relationship pattern was to find a boy, become completely obsessed with him for about six months, research CosmoGirl and Bliss for 'flirting tips', plot to ensnare him in my diary, then with some clever MSN maneuvering (we've all done the Appear Offline on/off trick so it looks like you've just signed on) manage to get him to ask me out. I literally normally did this by being 'weird' and 'funny'. (Unfortunately in my twenties this strategy has literally not ever once been successful.) Anyhow, they all ended up really nice and I was inevitably disappointed.  How I DREAMED about falling in love with someone who would treat me badly so I could play songs like this so it would be relevant. HOW I DREAMED. 


SCORE: 10/10

3. NELLY - MY PLACE/ FLAP YOUR WINGS (Up from 4)



Romantic Nelly lyric of the week

Attractiveness got me attacking this. I'm so fabulous, gluteus maximus! - Flap Your Wings

I first reviewed these songs three weeks ago.  (Can you believe these were this popular? I have hardly any memory of them and at this rate they'll show up in the top 5 today).

AVERAGE SCORE: 6.5/10

2. GIRLS ALOUD - LOVE MACHINE (Non-mover)



Had a horrible epiphany when watching this video that when this was filmed Girls Aloud were younger than I am now. This is important as Girls Aloud were instrumental in a key moment of my transition from childhood. When Sound of the Underground came out, myself, my sister and my cousins were obviously obsessed with it (flawless taste from 1990 til today). So at that family Christmas we decided to perform a treat for everyone. After taping the video from the Box so we could learn the dance routine, we decided to tape ourselves singing Sound of the Underground acapella. And then - this is The Bit which will convince you I was Born to Be a Star - we went downstairs and performed the dance routine to our family, parents, grandparents and great-grandparents included, whilst miming to our acapella tape. I have never been able to listen to that song for any of the past twelve years without thinking about that. Literally never.


SCORE - 9/10

1. ERIC PRYDZ - CALL ON ME (Non-mover)


Call On Me 'I'm sceptical to how good a workout this provides' screengrab of the week



SCORE: 4/10


TOP 5 TODAY: 5th October 2014

5. CALVIN HARRIS FT JOHN NEWMAN - BLAME (Down from 4)


Blog Club Discussion Question Of The Week: Is it more plausible to blame it on the night or blame it on the weatherman?


SCORE: 7/10

4. SIGMA FT PALOMA FAITH - CHANGING (Down from 2)


This song remains amazing and is one of the best songs of the year. I've said it before and I'll say it again, any song about an existential crisis deserves to be on a playlist of mine. However, I hate to get personal, but with that hideous ribbon concoction in her hair it's no wonder Paloma's getting frustrated is it?


3. TAYLOR SWIFT - SHAKE IT OFF (Non-mover)

Well this song has been in the top 5 a very long time now, hasn't it? It first entered the top 5 on the week of my 24th birthday (I remember clearly as I originally disliked this song so much it arguably ruined the whole day) and I am now basically approaching retirement. However, I can't deny that every time I listen to this song I like it That. Little. Bit. More. It probably deserved a 9 originally but then I loathe the video so much I have, to quote Dappy, no regrets.


SCORE: 8/10

2. JESSIE J, ARIANA GRANDE & NICKI MINAJ - BANG BANG (Down from number 1)


So Fleur East did a performance of this on X Factor Judges Houses this week. It was very relevant and current. Probably my favourite performance of the whole stage.


If you remember, a couple of months ago I took an indepth look at all of the X Factor last place contestants ever. So I know I'm unusually equipped with the information for this due to the large amount of research (googling people's Twitter accounts and watching a few YouTube links) conducted, but Fleur has been to the live shows before as a member of Addictiv Ladies. However, as you'll note if you click through the links of my last blog posts, all prior Twitter accounts etc have been deleted.  Yes, we all know that the Addictiv Ladies gave potentially one of the worst live show performances of all time, but you can't go on about how Judges Houses is going to change your life and so on and so forth when YOU'VE LITERALLY GOT THROUGH JUDGES HOUSES BEFORE. I think Fleur may be the first person to ever get to the live shows twice (please feel free to correct me if I'm wrong) and you think given the deal they've made about other returning contestants they'd at least mention it. Utterly bizarre. Anyway, the important thing is Fleur has now found the missing E from Addictive Ladies and that E is for Extremely Good.

Oh yeah - back on point - this song is still amazing.

I first reviewed this last week.

SCORE: 9/10

1. MEGHAN TRAINOR - ALL ABOUT THAT BASS (Up from number 33)


Now. I like songs about having a big arse. Having a big arse is very en vogue right now and I'm all over it. I am not thin. Whether I can manage to get into a pair of size 12 trousers is a weekly battle that sometimes I win and sometimes I don't depending on how much time I've been spending with my boyfriend Pizza. The cards I was dealt by the Body Gods (who I imagine probably all look like David Gandy) is that my waist is two to three sizes smaller than my hips. This means for the past five years or so (since the day I realised I was unable to eat two fast food meals a day and maintain a size 10) I thought I was lucky enough to be able to make myself look thinner than I am in Instagram photos by wearing lots of belts and posing like a teapot a lot. Still though, much as I wish I could live my life through an X Pro filter and walking around with a hand on my hips in a slightly jaunty fashion, I sadly can't. So like everyone, and I mean it, everyone, sometimes I get really down about the way I look. Sometimes I look in the mirror once and feel the need to avoid it for the next four days. 

However! Recently there have been lots of songs and lots of good press about having a big arse. This has coincided with a period of confidence meaning that rather than constantly wearing skater dresses and hoping no one would notice like days of yore, I've been embracing my hip to waist ratio, which I know a lot of people really want, by trying on lots of pencil skirts and taking selfies and waiting for the favourites on Twitter to roll in. And oh they have! So generally, I feel much better about myself today than I did say, three months ago. And if I have Meghan Trainor to thank for a bit of that, all I can say is thank you, because nothing feels better than feeling like you look good. (And I can't tell you how difficult it was to resist putting a recent full body body-con dress selfie at the end of this paragraph, which is always a good sign). 

But it's not as simple as that, is it? I know you've all read enough thinkpieces about this to populate the collective works of Shakespeare so I won't go on and on, but I personally don't believe in shaming anyone for their body, whatever their size, or valuing your own body based on the perceptions of men. 

And as for the song itself, aside from lyrical content, I'm not a big fan of 'doo-wop' or songs that sound like a demo as they literally are demos. I cannot deny however that it is catchy AS HELL so I'll give it a 5.


SCORE: 5/10


SO... DRUM ROLL:

10 YEARS AGO TOP 5: 36.5/50
TOP 5 TODAY: 38/10

Another win for today, but we must admit even if the songs in the top 5 around now seem pretty stagnant, they are quite good aren't they?

Until next week, chart fans! 


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